May 2012
1 post
Waaaaaaaaaat
Oh lord I’m going to Boyfriend’s prom tomorrow. Good Christ, I’m wearing a dress. WHAT IS THIS INSANITY. Also, Boyfriend is six foot-four, so even with five inch heels on, he’s still a couple inches taller than me. And he looks fine as hell in formalwear, let me just say.
And now I feel like such a girl. Bawwwwwwwww.
Anywhozlebees, my mother has demanded “pictures...
April 2012
4 posts
But I Give Buns to the Elephant When I Go Down to...
In recent news, my super awesome oldest sister is in town for the next few days and I am SO EXCITED because I NEVER SEE HER. She’s currently getting her PhD, which is a huge bucket of lame with regards to seeing her ever. Don’t get me wrong, I could not be prouder of her scholarly pursuits; I just wish she could go to school closer to home so I wouldn’t have to miss her so much...
Anonymous asked: How is your relationship going?
Anonymous asked: Do you ever think about all the people you've hurt and used, and just want to kill yourself?
Here's milk for his porringer and butter for his...
If there is one thing that makes me hate being female it is this: I want to rail against the patriarchal society that tells me my greatest worth is in my looks. The idea that a woman is useless unless she is also ornamental or that an attractive woman is somehow worth more than an unattractive one makes me sick, as does the fact that the first insult directed at any political, scientific, or...
March 2012
1 post
I agree with whoever said this is going to be the...
February 2012
1 post
Let me play you the song of my people
This Saturday, I’ll be helping to teach a workshop on songs of love and death in Irish and Scottish folk music. I didn’t realize until this week the sheer volume of the aforementioned genre. Seriously guys, EVERY FOLK SONG IS ABOUT AT LEAST ONE OF THOSE TWO THINGS. ALL OF THEM. And most of them are about both. WHY ARE THERE SO MANY SPRIGHTLY MURDER BALLADS? I know like four love songs...
January 2012
3 posts
No Tomatoes
I’m apparently seeing someone. What is this nonsense? Having a functional relationship that isn’t making me pull my hair out? Blasphemy! But in all seriousness, this is good. I’m all trying to have social interactions and meaningful interpersonal connections and whatnot. LOOK AT ME ADULTING LIKE A GODDAMN PRO. Also I haven’t been this happy for a long while. And it’s...
Back to the previous nonsense
Is it in terrible taste to have a crush on someone’s tattoo?
To elaborate, if the person in question is only vaguely interesting until I notice the insanely pretty ink, does it make me a terrible person if I talk to them just so I can stare at it for a longer period of time? Seriously guys, it’s the prettiest fucking thing I’ve ever seen.
We Interrupt Your Irregularly Scheduled Nonsense
https://www.google.com/landing/takeaction/ http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Main_Page http://sopatrack.com/ http://stopthewall.us/ I urge you to contact your state representatives to let them know that a vote for SOPA or PIPA is one fewer than they’ll get from you in the next election.
November 2011
1 post
1 tag
formspring.me
Ask me questions about things. Ask me them. http://www.formspring.me/wordinedgewise
August 2011
1 post
WUBWUBWUBWUB
So Lollapalooza is happening again, only this year I get to enjoy it minus the sulking at home because I can’t go. Because I am going. In case that wasn’t clear.
Anyway.
A Perfect Circle is going to be playing. A PERFECT CIRCLE IS GOING TO BE PLAYING. Also, Beats fucking Antique. I am physically vibrating with excitement over this shit.
Also, WHAT IS THIS NONSENSE I AM UPDATING...
June 2011
2 posts
1 tag
formspring.me
Ask me anything http://formspring.me/wordinedgewise
May 2011
5 posts
Hark!
So work today was interesting.
The host for tonight, Khan, emigrated here from Vietnam decades ago. He’s a really nice, laid back guy and he speaks very fluent English with a slight accent. Everyone loves him because he can take a joke and is generally amiable towards everyone. This will come up later.
At around 7:30, right in the middle of the dinner rush, a man came into the restaurant...
Carrot Cake
Cake recipe:
2 and 1/2 cups all-purpose flour 1 and 1/4 teaspoons baking POWDER 1 teaspoon baking SODA 1/2 teaspoon salt 1 and 1/4 teaspoons cinnamon 1/2 teaspoon nutmeg 1/8 teaspoon cloves 4 large eggs, room temperature 1 and 1/4 cups maple syrup OR 1 cup turbinado sugar and 3/4 cups dark brown sugar 1 cup vegetable oil 1 pound carrots, peeled and finely grated 1 cup roasted walnuts (optional)
...
Ampersand Ampersand Ampersand
I was reminded today that I do not update enough. I am ninety percent sure that almost nobody reads this, so I figured it wasn’t too big a deal, but I’m updating anyway, just to prove them wrong. I am nothing if not contrary.
I want to get a massage. My back hates me. The problem is that I am an awkward human being and therefore turn into a pile of uncomfortable silences and nervous...
Listen
Heliotrope: Cliche of the sun god.
Buying thing off of the internet is terribly addictive. You don’t feel the money leaving your hand, you don’t have to walk in and out of a building or speak to a person. It feels as though it never happened, but you still get the endorphinsaratonindopamineohmygod NEW STUFF NEW STUFF! feeling. Ebay and Etsy are dangerous places. With the same first and last letters. What the shit.
...
April 2011
1 post
WatchWHAT IS THIS I DON’T EVEN.
seawitchery:
I started out clicking strategically… and by the end was just wildly clicking and dancing in my chair.
biancavirina:
CLICK THE SQUARES.
THE WHOLE WORLD NEEDS TO KNOW ABOUT THIS.
THIS THIS THIS THIS!
Which a minute will reverse
If poor decisions were an Olympic sport, I’d probably accidentally miss the medal presentation ceremony, having tried and failed to put on my shoes while running down the stairs.
I would be posthumously awarded the gold.
March 2011
4 posts
better than blessed: i imagine a set of huge... →
You should grow some. Or maybe whiskers. Whiskers are extremely sensitive to just about everything. But they can’t smell faces or liars, as far as I know. So maybe it’s a moot point. Still.
dreamgeometries:
i imagine a set of huge antennae jutting out of the peak of my head, the kind bugs have, not the radio kind. i could twitch them about, reading the subtle electromagnetic...
Listen
February 2011
1 post
Why can’t I stop listening to this?
January 2011
4 posts
Not a minor thing. Get it? It's a punne, or play...
So I’m eighteen now. What the fuck. I am legally an adult.
Nuhhhhhhhh.
I cannot decide whether I’m excited or terrified. This is the year I start paying taxes and move out of my parent’s house and get a job that pays living wage and pay bills and rent and register to vote and can no longer glare at creepy old guys on the subway and politely inform them that I’m underage...
The Epitwee's Inclined To Fits
I have something like twenty drafts on this infernal website that I am either unable to finish or cannot be assed about. Half of them are SO SUPER OUT OF DATE IT’S UNBELIEVABLE and are therefore irrelevant, the other half are angsty, stupid, boring, or otherwise flawed enough that I don’t want to subject those of you that actually read this crap to them. It would be cruel to punish you...
“Good. Item seven. The had had and that that problem. […]...”
– Grammar. Fuck yeah.
Actually, it’s from Jasper Fforde. So Jasper Fforde. Fuck yeah.
November 2010
2 posts
friz318 asked: Will you be my tumblr prom date?
October 2010
6 posts
I think maybe someday I’d like to possibly fall in love. I’m not sure. It sounds scary. But it’s something I don’t understand. That gives it some appeal.
Here’s hoping that, if I do, the entire experience doesn’t suck.
8 tags
Sex, Death, and Religion.
Over the course of the last few months, six college-age boys have killed themselves after being outed. These were young men with their lives ahead of them who will never see their families or friends again. They’ll never have a chance to get old, to fall in love, or to live their lives as themselves.
Knowing that the only reason these boys were driven to suicide was society’s...
I'm Pretty Sure It's Octopodes.
Somehow, it is both comforting and disheartening to know how few people will hear what I have to say. I realize that this is some part of the human condition; the idea that our opinions must matter to someone other than ourselves and the desire for that number to be as high as possible, but that makes it all the more frustrating.
Everyone is trying so hard to be heard that there isn’t any...
“We are all brothers under the skin and I, for one, would be willing to skin...”
– Ayn Rand
BECAUSE I AM A CRUEL WOMAN. →
THERE IS NO POSSIBLE REASON THIS SHOULD, OR EVEN COULD EXIST.
WHAT THE HELL, INTERNET?
WHAT COULD PIRATES POSSIBLY NEED WITH FORENSICS?
AND WHY SPECIFICALLY CSI: NEW YORK? IF THE PIRATES ARE IN THE CARIBBEAN, NEW YORK WOULD BE INCREDIBLY IMPRACTICAL.
GAH.
September 2010
4 posts
Oh my goodness
Oh goodness me.
I have designed my eighteenth birthday present. It is a tattoo. Which is the reason for its need to be designed. I am mostly reduced to incoherence by my excitement.
I have wanted a back piece for ever-so-long and this one is going to be BEAUTIFUL.
Also, chock-full of Norse mythology, which is my favorite world mythology aside from possibly Greek.
The focus will be the world...
Don't look at me with that tone of voice.
So mini panic attacks are not very fun.
I count myself extremely fortunate that I do not have any sort of panic disorder if it means that I’d feel like that constantly. And anxiety is not something you ever get fully inured to.
I’m not sure what actually set it off, which is problematic. But, on the upside, it’s all over now and my head is fixed, so I’m going to drink...
It is definitely not time to panic. That is all.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And on that note, I’m getting some sleep now. Or at least trying to.
Wake me up when it’s Monday again.
Makes a terrible lullaby.
O Brother, Where Art...
August 2010
4 posts
Queer as a clockwork orange.
I have a new sensation I hate. When you walk into a room for a reason and as soon as you step in, you completely forget what it is you went in for. Because for the last couple months, I feel like that constantly. Like some half-remembered thought is vying for my attention, but I just can’t work my way past the little roadblocks my brain puts up and get to it.
I want to do or see or have...
Iggy and the Stooges' Contract Rider. →
Good god this man is completely insane. My favorite part:
The next page contains the information you require. Bear with me. Not a real bear, of course, like a grizzly.. By the way, I have a friend who assures me that the panda does not belong to the “Bear” family, but is actually a part of the “Pig”family. Could this possibly be true? It would explain why you don’t...
swapmeet:
Gee Whiz, Buck 65
I know that most...
July 2010
6 posts
Also, Fairy Tales.
I didn’t consider it much before today, but did you ever think that Beauty didn’t love the prince as much as she loved the beast?
Of all the fairy tales, Beauty and the Beast focuses the most on building solid, real, interpersonal relationships. Over a span of more than three days, which seems unreal by Disney standards. The story centers around overlooking appearances and loving the...
these things keep me up at night
I think about worrisome things when there isn’t enough noise going on in the house to distract me. Sometimes, they’re just odd; natural disasters that couldn’t actually happen, chicken stock catching fire, that sort of thing.
And sometimes they’re not about catastrophes, but are instead disgustingly pseudo-philosophical and make the back of my brain itch. For instance, I...
Oh hey
Awesome news, I no longer have face leprosy. I didn’t even have to inject myself with Chalmugra oil. Hurray!
Now I’m just super tan on my face, shoulders, and arms, and super white everywhere else. I’m a crazy-quilt dragon. It’s silly looking. The shirt I was wearing had a boat-neck, so when I wear my swimsuit I have two perfect triangles of white skin on my chest....
